For those of you who are unfamiliar with my background and my “story;” my personal journey of transformation and change began when I became consciously aware of the fact that not only did I not love myself, I didn’t even like myself and I pretty much loathed everything about me.
The negative beliefs, thoughts and feelings I held towards myself manifested in deep seated issues around food and a poor body image. Over the past several years I have done a huge amount of tranformational work (using CBE) and have healed my inner being, freeing it from former negative thoughts and patterns. I now love and accept myself just as I am. And food is my friend rather then my enemy.
So you can imagine my dismay when three or four weeks ago issues regarding food began to re-surface in my life. The Observer in me noticed that food was beginning to control me again. A fear of food emerged. I was eating when I wasn’t hungry. I was grabbing two, three, four extra handfuls of food even though I was satisfied with one. I was eating much more then my body required.
Thank goodness I didn’t revert back to my past pattern of binge eating and other destructive behaviors around food. However I didn’t like what was happening and I began to wonder, “Have I reverted back to the old? Has all the good I have accomplished become unravelled?”
The first thing I did was check inside of myself with my parts. My parts assured me that they were still on-board with loving me and using food as nutrition rather then as a coping mechanism and that nothing had changed. All is good.
Then I checked in with The Tribunal (my channeling guides) and what they told me was that right now the atmosphere and the energy of the planet was bringing to the surface of my consciousness ,deeper more engrained layers of meta (life script) issues. Food, eating, weight and body image. These issues were coming to the surface and into my conscious awareness for clearing. The Tribunal assured me that there was no unravelling or back sliding going on. In fact The Tribunal said that this is good news. I was ready to go deeper into the healing of my Soul; of my pure essence.
Once I had this understanding and perspective I knew exactly what to do. I recommitted myself to loving and accepting myself just as I am. I recommitted myself to all my positive, unlimiting beliefs about food, my body, myself, my worthiness, my deserving, about life and other people. Through meditation, conscious work and speaking to my parts, I am in process of flushing out these deeper layers of my meta issue which have come forward for deeper healing. As they are being released, I feel victorious, more in command of myself, even more in love with myself then ever before.
For those of you who are also moving along a journey of personal growth and transformation, when you feel you have dealt with an issue and it comes rearing right back up in your face, the first thing I would suggest is to be honest with yourself. Have you really dealt with the issue? Or did you sweep it under a rock or tucked it away inside yourself where it has been simmering and festering all this time?
If you have done the work, using a transformative tool like Core Belief Engineering, and the issue is coming up again, consider that it’s deeper layers rising to the surface for resolution. Acknowledge how far you’ve come; how much you have achieved and that now you are ready to go deeper. The Universe and All There Is support you.
Love, Esther
