Last night I was sitting on my couch watching GLEE while basking in the moonlight that was pouring in through the window and landing right on my face. It was the eve of tonight’s full moon. And because I live high in the sky, yes the moonlight actually floods through my windows.
I believe that full moon energy helps us to bring closure to behaviors and situations in our lives we are ready to release. It is the end of cycle. Whenever there’s a full moon, I think about what I don’t want to carry with me into the next moon and I use the energy of the moon beams to clear it away. I simply sit or stand within its light and ask the moon to cleanse me of all that no longer serves me, on all levels; emotional, physical, spiritual and mental. As a Cancerian who has a deep connection with the moon I find it works and I schedule time each month to bask in the energy.
Last night I felt a particularly strong cleansing underway and I was curious, so I asked inside to my Soul, “What am I clearing this full moon?”
My Soul whispered back by showing me memories of public school. I can’t remember what grade I was in but it was post parents separation and most likely grade seven or eight. This was a time when I was extremely overweight, 220 pounds plus. I was insecure, critical, mean and very unhappy. I had two best friends Barbie and Kim. Barbie was pretty and the smartest girl in class. Kim was the girl that all the boys wanted to date because she was the perfect girl next door. Then there was me. The three of us were very close and great friends for many years.
My Soul showed me the stored memory of the day Barbie and Kim approached me and said, “Esther, we don’t want to be friends with you anymore.” They gave me a song and dance of how I lived too far away from them. I was not of the same ethnic background and I didn’t go to the same church they did. As the memory played on, my Soul showed me how devastated I was. How I came to my own conclusions that they didn’t want to hang out with me because I was fat and ugly and the boys didn’t like me. I saw how at the time I felt like I didn’t fit in and I didn’t belong.
As the memory played my Soul whispered that even though I have dealt with many of my insecurities from the past, this memory was still a filter on my eyes and it was affecting how I continue to see myself in everyday life. “The moonlight,” it whispered, “Is removing this filter from your eyes.”
As my Soul continued to play the memory, it showed me sitting on the ground of the school yard with my back up against a wall when one of the girls in my class Erica came over, sat beside me and asked me what was wrong. I told her that Barbie and Kim no longer wanted to be my friend and she put her hand on my leg and said, “I’ll be your friend.” My Soul reminded me how this was a very pivotal moment, for Erica and I became best friends right up until the end of high school when she got married and I moved away to attend university. Erica was an important and integral part of my life .
My Soul wanted me to consciously understand that even though that parting of the ways with Barbie and Kim hurt and wounded me deeply, it was necessary to usher in a wonderful friendship with Erica. I did understand this on some level but last night basking in the beams of the full moon, I was able to see and understand at a deeper level. Last night the moon cleared away old hurt, feelings, beliefs and memories. When I woke up this morning I felt cleansed. And today I look at myself and the world with new eyes.
Love that you actually have moon light flooding in! We have way too many city lights for that!
Tomorrow morning I am moving to a new residence so tonight I will be able to experience the full moon flooding into my window. And yes my new place will offer me the same experience. It was on my “must have” list of things I require in a home. I compromised with less storage which turned out to be a good thing. As I cleared the extra stuff–I had even more of an inner cleanse.
What a great story! Thanks for sharing! I use the moon for “talking to” to help bring me “back to being grounded” when I see it every time! I too love the way the moon energizes and lifts my spirits, especially in full “bloom!”
Line: The moon is great for talking to and is very grounding. I remember the first sweat lodge I did was under a full moon and it was electric.